Archive for July 2019

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Burger Joints (6)

Average Chick-Fil-A Makes Twice As Much In Sales As A McDonald's

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
In-N-Out Burger Mystery Solved, And The Story Is Super Boring

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Woman In Georgia McDonald's Fires Gun Over Cold Fries, #America

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
If Burger King Cooks Halloumi Burger In Same Fryer As Chicken Nuggets, Is It Still Vegetarian?

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Swedish Burger Kings Dares You To Tell Meat And Plant-Based Burgers Apart

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Do We Trust Burger King To Make An Adequate $1 Taco?

By Kate Bernot Read More

Casual Dining (1)

Cheesecake Factory, Jimmy John's Top Annual List Of Medically Inadvisable Foods

By Kate Bernot Read More

Chicken Chains (6)

Food Fight A Fireable Offense At Vermont KFC/Taco Bell

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Texas Man With Nothing To Lose Steals Ambulance To Grab Smokes, KFC

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
KFC In Australia Tests Fast-Food Model With Fewer Humans

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
We Tried The KFC Cheetos Sandwich So Now You'll Have To

By Kevin Pang Read More
Popeyes Smell Causes Unbearable Conditions For Florida Town

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
McDonald's Franchisees Desperately Beg For Chick-Fil-A-Like Sandwich

By Kate Bernot Read More

Coffee Shops (2)

Starbucks Delivery Will Go Nationwide By Early 2020

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Everyone Acting Exceedingly Polite In This Starbucks-Cops Kerfuffle

By Kate Bernot Read More

Cook (2)

Should You Wash And Reuse Ziploc Bags?

By Kate Bernot Read More
How Do You Remove The Dang Silk Off Corn? Don't Even Bother.

By Kate Bernot Read More

Cooking (7)

The Spanish Fried Squid Sandwich That Almost Got Away

By A.E. Dwyer Read More
You Too Can Make Linda's Hell Yeah Chicken Wings

By Kate Bernot Read More
How I Became An Instant Pot Ribs Convert

By A.E. Dwyer Read More
How To Make Shrimp Cocktail Like A Fancy Bastard

By Danny Palumbo Read More
Break Pesto From Its Italian Confines With Spicy Thai Basil Noodles

By Kate Bernot Read More
Say Hiya To Hiyashi Chuka, The Japanese Cold Noodles Made For Summer

By A.E. Dwyer Read More
How To Use Garlic Scapes In Your Cooking

By Kate Bernot Read More

Drinks (8)

Pilsner, Often Derided As Fizzy Yellow Beer, Is The Gold Standard Of Lagers

By Andrew Gill Read More
Ask Kate About Beer: Why Does The Same Amount Of Beer Make Me Hungover Sometimes But Not Others?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Kölsch Is A Refreshing German Beer For The Sultry Days Of Summer

By Randall Colburn Read More
Why Are People Obsessed With White Claw?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Hey Brewers, What's Your Go-To Supermarket Beer?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Beer Of The Week: Hot Days Call For Früh Kölsch By The Liter

By Kate Bernot Read More
Everything You Need To Know About Baijiu, China's Funky And Complex Crown Jewel Spirit

By Kate Bernot Read More
There Is An Objectively Perfect Package For Every Style Of Beer

By Kate Bernot Read More

Exclusives (2)

Talking America's Complicated Fast-Food Feelings With A Guy Who Sorted Through Them

By Kate Bernot Read More
Meet The Poor Guy Who's Been Asked "Is A Hot Dog A Sandwich?" Every Day For The Last 4 Years

By Kevin Pang Read More

Fast Food (1)

Hey 2020 Presidential Candidate John Hickenlooper, Is A Hot Dog A Sandwich?

By Kate Bernot Read More

Grilling and Smoking (2)

What Happens When You Smoke A Whole Cheeseburger

By John Carruthers Read More
Grill Your Romaine Lettuce, Ya Fancy Bastard

By Kevin Pang Read More

Grocery (8)

The Takeout's Fantasy Food Draft: Best Party Dip

By Kevin Pang Read More
A Taste Test To Determine The Best Barbecue Potato Chips

By Nick Leggin Read More
The Takeout's Fantasy Food Draft: Best Supermarket Beer

By Kevin Pang Read More
Let's Settle The Doritos Debate: Nacho Cheese Vs. Cool Ranch

By Kevin Pang Read More
The Takeout's Fantasy Food Draft: Best Food Mascot

By Kevin Pang Read More
Microwave Vs. Oven: Which Frozen Dinners Are Worth The Extra Time?

By Nick Leggin Read More
Is A $10 Box Of Kids Cereal For Adults Actually Worth It?

By Kate Bernot Read More
The Takeout's Fantasy Food Draft: Best Cookies

By Kevin Pang Read More

Mexican (2)

Drunk Customer At Taco Bell Drive-Thru Pours Hennessy On Employee

By Kate Bernot Read More
Taco Bell Customer Finds "Doorknob" In Nachos

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More

News (105)

Last Call: "If It Had Ham In It, It's Closer To A British Carbonara"

By Kate Bernot Read More
Texas Man Faces Trial For Sending Chocolate Dick To Police Employee

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
36% Of Americans Would Eat Salsa Mixed With Ranch Dressing

By Kate Bernot Read More
Anheuser-Busch InBev Banned From Indian Capital For 3 Years

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
The Guac Is Not Extra At Chipotle Today

By Kate Bernot Read More
This Month In Overturned Trucks: Beer, Molasses, Pig Intestines

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: Adoptable Puppies Named For Taco Bell Foods Are Today's Internet Blessing

By Kate Bernot Read More
When Should Halloween Be?

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Tempe Police's Free Beverage Campaign Awarded The Takeout's Worst PR Rollout Of 2019

By Kate Bernot Read More
Study: Feeding Red Wine To Mice Makes Them Happy

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Last Call: Alright, I Finally Tried Naturdays

By Kate Bernot Read More
Copious Booze Blamed For Cruise Ship Brawl That, For The Record, Did Not Involve Clowns

By Kate Bernot Read More
Survey: Delivery Drivers Want To Eat Your Food

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
US Cybersecurity Agency Uses Pineapple Pizza To Warn Americans About Election Meddling

By Kate Bernot Read More
Indianapolis Cop Claims Someone Bit His McDonald's Sandwich, Later Remembers It Was Him

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Anonymous Jerk Costs Idaho Pizzerias Hundreds With Prank Orders

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Werner Herzog Reveals His Favorite Movie Snack

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Oreo, Chips Ahoy Labels Will Soon Suggest We Not Scarf 15 Cookies At Once

By Kate Bernot Read More
Go Ahead, Misplace Your Costco Card

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: The Showiest Skill I Learned As A Server

By Kate Bernot Read More
Your Thoughts: Single-Serving Lunch Meats?

By Kevin Pang Read More
McDonald's To Test More International Menu Items From Japan, Mexico

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
It's Not So Easy Living In City With America's Highest Minimum Wage

By Kate Bernot Read More
Beyond Meat Takes On The Holy Grail: Bacon

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Last Call: A&W's Third-Pound Burger Proved America Sucks At Math

By Kate Bernot Read More
Kids Under 16 Barred From Buying Energy Drinks In U.K.

By Kate Bernot Read More
Fox & Friends Co-Anchor Says Friendly Fast Food Employees "Make A Lot Of Money"

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
DoorDash Finally Agrees To Fix Unpopular Tipping Policy [Updated]

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: I Want To Make Martin Yan's Beauty Queen Beef

By Kevin Pang Read More
London Men Fined For Eating Raw Squirrels To Protest Veganism

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
How Many Animals Have Been Found In Salads Since 2003?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Body Of Grocery Worker Missing For 10 Years Found Trapped Behind Store's Cooler

By Kate Bernot Read More
Macy's Pulls Stupid Fat-Shaming Plates From Stores

By Kate Bernot Read More
The Midwest's Greatest Sandwich Is The Breaded Pork Tenderloin

By Clint Worthington Read More
Last Call: Jenny Lewis, Ladies And Gentlemen

By Kate Bernot Read More
Mayim Bialik Opening Vegan Restaurant Not Called Big Bang Blossom

By Kate Bernot Read More
New York Times Reporter Moonlights As Food-App Deliveryman, Realizes People Suck

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
No One Has A "Regular" Supermarket

By Kate Bernot Read More
Triple Cheeseburgers Are Unnecessary

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: CeeLo Green Tackles Hall & Oates

By Kevin Pang Read More
Study: List Sugary Sodas Last And People Won't Order As Many

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Bologna Sandwich Fight Ends In Third-Degree Assault Charges

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Turns Out People Like A Fast Food Buffet [Updated]

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
New Book What Would Jesus Really Eat? Makes Christian Case For Eating Meat

By Kate Bernot Read More
New California Law Allows Diners To Bring Their Own Containers For Restaurant Leftovers

By Kate Bernot Read More
Five Male Individuals Arrested At Five Guys

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
I Learned 3 Valuable Lessons From This New Pesto Cookbook

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: Watch Robots Solve A Rubik's Cube In .38 Seconds

By Kate Bernot Read More
Americans Wake Up To The Superiority Of Dark Meat Chicken

By Kevin Pang Read More
Teenager Drinks Arizona Iced Tea, Puts It Back On The Shelf, Winds Up In Jail

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Surprise! People Like A Free Meal On Dates

By Kate Bernot Read More
Impossible Foods Will Flow Like A Fake-Meat River Once Again

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Who's Eating Meatless Fast-Food Burgers? Not Vegans

By Kate Bernot Read More
Cauliflower Pizza Reaches The Epicenter Of Mainstream: Chuck E. Cheese

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
It's Easy Being Green: An Appreciation Of Green River Soda

By Shannon Nico Shreibak Read More
Biting Into Peanut Shells Vs. Cracking With Fingers (A Cordial Takeout Conversation)

By Kevin Pang Read More
Last Call: Here Lies The World's Creepiest Food Mascot

By Kevin Pang Read More
What If Pizza Boxes Are The Future Of Local News?

By Kate Bernot Read More
The Wienermobile Is On Airbnb

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Utah Boy Slings "Ice Cold Beer," Has Police Called On Him

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Is America Ready For A Blueberry McGriddle?

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Wacky Canadians Now Have Their Own Hot Dog Rules

By Kevin Pang Read More
Bacon Bitch Sues Breakfast Bitch

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: Why You Can't Buy Bob Ross Paintings

By Kate Bernot Read More
Super Size Me 2 Has A Trailer, Will Continue To State The Obvious

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
America Gets The Nationally Available Keto Pizza We Apparently Demand

By Kate Bernot Read More
Study: "Secondhand Drinking" Harms 1 In 5 Americans

By Kate Bernot Read More
The St. Louis Slinger Is A Hot Mess

By Danny Palumbo Read More
Last Call: The Time Rowan Atkinson Interviewed Elton John

By Kevin Pang Read More
Domino's Now Using Cameras To Assess Whether Your Pizza Is Good [Updated]

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Technology Is Making Fast Food Jobs Even More Stressful

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Man Sues Over TGI Fridays Menu That Didn't List Drink Prices

By Kate Bernot Read More
Doordash Driver Delivers Meal After Eating Some Of It

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Cake Decorator Mistakes "Moana" For "Marijuana," Gets Fired

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Last Call: Before Bourdain, There Was Michael Palin The Travel Host

By Kevin Pang Read More
Charlotte Bar Sued For Illegally Playing "I Wanna Dance With Somebody"

By Kevin Pang Read More
Fires At Two Wisconsin Restaurants Caused By... Sushi Crunchies?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Praise Be, Taco Bell's Tortilla Shortage Has Ended ????

By Kate Bernot Read More
Last Call: Turns Out, There are laws When You're Drinkin Claws

By Kate Bernot Read More
Bartenders Are Wearing A Small Pin For A Big Reason

By Kate Bernot Read More
PSA: Case Of Beer Not To Be Substituted For Child Booster Seat

By Kate Bernot Read More
Impossible... Fish?

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Pizza Chain To Start Selling "Just The Crusts" Box

By Kate Bernot Read More
Let's Talk About How We Slurpee

By Kevin Pang Read More
Last Call: Netflix Finally Delivers Taco Documentary

By Kate Bernot Read More
Could A Simple Decibel Meter Solve Restaurants' Noise Problems?

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Women Who Give Up Alcohol Improve Their Mental Well-Being, Reports Journal Of No Shit Sherlock

By Kate Bernot Read More
You Will Pry The Word "Nuggs" From Our Cold, Knobby Hands

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Nothing Good Comes Of Taking Photos On Safari Hunts, Just Ask These Ex-Grocery Managers

By Kate Bernot Read More
Plot Thickens In Ice Cream Licking Saga [Updated]

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Fire In The Belly: Cool Times At Chicago's Hot Sauce Expo

By Nina Corcoran Read More
Last Call: A Tasty Tour Of Chicago's Finest Burgers

By Kevin Pang Read More
Tony Packo's Is The World Capital Of Autographed Hot Dog Buns

By Zach Brooke Read More
Jaden Smith Launches Vegan Food Truck To Feed L.A. Homeless

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Budweiser Sponsorship Reminds People To Watch Women's Soccer The Rest Of The Time, Too

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
Boston Market Closes 10 Percent Of Stores In Crowded Rotisserie Chicken Field

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
A Formal Taxonomy Of Sour Candies

By Marnie Shure Read More
Last Call: Watch The Masters Cook On Japanese Style Originator

By Kate Bernot Read More
Burger King's Fried Halloumi Burger Now In U.K., Perhaps One Step Closer To America

By Kevin Pang Read More
Orange Bird Thought To Be Exotic Just An Asshole Seagull Covered In Turmeric

By Kate Bernot Read More
Don't Just Read The Headlines About That Processed Foods-Autism Study

By Kate Bernot Read More
Nathan's Champion Wins Again On Strength Of Crystal Light-Soaked Hot Dogs

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
New Coke Is Back Because No Product Is Too Shitty For A Stranger Things Tie-In

By Kate Bernot Read More
Lawsuit Claims White Reese's Are Lying To The People

By Dominick Suzanne-Mayer Read More
91 Years Of Chili Dogs: How Atlanta's The Varsity Lasts And Lasts

By Will Hodge Read More

Pizzerias (2)

Pizza Hut's "New And Improved" Pan Pizza Is New But Not Improved

By Kevin Pang Read More
Pizza Hut Testing Carry-Out Pizza Lockers For Introverts

By Kate Bernot Read More

Reviews (11)

Ask The Salty Waitress: How Annoying Is It To Ask For A Table 15 Minutes Before Closing Time?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: The Bartender Refused To Accept My ID

By Kate Bernot Read More
What If We Blended A Beyond Burger... With Beef?

By Kevin Pang Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: How Do I Get Parents To Turn Down Their Kids' iPads?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: Can I Get A Refund On This Terrible Festival Food?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: What's The Deal With My Bill's "Employee Benefit" Surcharge?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: Shouldn't I Get A Discount If I Order A Dish Without Meat?

By Kate Bernot Read More
Awww Shucks: There Are No Finer Oysters On The West Coast Than At Taylor Shellfish Farms

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: I Don't Want To Serve Politicians Against My Moral Code

By Kevin Pang Read More
Best Of The Worst Questions From Ask The Salty Waitress

By Kate Bernot Read More
Ask The Salty Waitress: The Server Threw Out My Leftovers

By Kate Bernot Read More

Stores And Chains (1)

Chef Fired For Pouring Scalding Hot Butter Down Colleague's Pants

By Kate Bernot Read More