10 Hostess Snacks Ranked Worst To Best

Hostess treats have a long and illustrious history and have been a darling of lunch box treats for decades. Granted, some Hostess snacks have evolved from their origins. The world-renowned Twinkie started as a banana treat before it became what it is today. Whether your parents packed you a Twinkie or a cupcake, it was always a win. Not only are both options major cafeteria swag, but on that lunch circuit they hold tremendous value in the event you want to make a trade. While I did not grow up in an exclusive Hostess house (because how can you not stock Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls), I'm a long time fan of both the flavors and the nostalgia each brings.

Whether you are chocolate, vanilla, or fruit leaning, Hostess has a wide variety of flavor varieties to suit almost every sweet tooth. As a parent now myself, I get why my parents bought them regularly. The shelf life is far longer than most bakery snacks and the fact that they are each individually packed makes it easy to toss them in a school lunch, dance bag, or your purse. Wherever you go, you can bring Hostess backup with you to quell any hangry children about to have a meltdown in the backseat. Just toss one back like a zookeeper feeding the lions, and keep on moving. Now come with me on a tour of 10 Hostess confections and see how they stack up in a ranking from worst to best.

I was certain that the chocolate version of Twinkies would be a slam dunk. What's not to love? Chocolate sponge cake and a luscious sweet chocolate cream filling are the hallmarks of this Twinkie iteration. Sign me up! At least that was my first thought when I opened the box. Unfortunately, Hostess Chocolate Twinkies left much to be desired. Too much. The cake is just okay and almost exactly the same texture as the classic Twinkie. The chocolate cream filling tastes like cocoa flavored shaving cream to me. It's not a good situation. As a self-proclaimed chocoholic, it pains me to find such fault with a treat I was genuinely looking forward to being a front-runner. Not all dreams come true.

As if the flavor and texture is not underwhelming enough, we need to discuss the physical appearance. I'm just going to come right out and say it. The Hostess Chocolate Twinkie looks like poop. That's not why Twinkies are actually banned in some parts of Europe, but it's not exactly desirable. How are we supposed to get excited about a dessert that resembles the least appetizing thing you can think of seeing on a plate? There's nothing okay about it and I think it was a missed opportunity by Hostess to not at least decorate it a bit. At least some accessorizing with icing or sprinkles, SOMETHING, ANYTHING, to keep it looking like feces. There is always chatter out there about Twinkies having an infinite shelf life. I sure hope that's not the case for the chocolate variety.

Sometimes a good coffee cake really hits the spot. While I associate anything coffee cake with my grandmother's mahjong meet ups, there is just something about the vibrant cinnamon flavor and the streusel topping. One lesser-known coffee cake fun fact is that they do not actually contain any coffee. I personally believe that in the world of coffee cakes, it's the crumb topping that steals the show. Don't even get me started on those little sugary crunchy bits. They are not only super delicious, but also a fun play on textures against the soft and moist cake. The Hostess Coffee Cakes hit high on the moist meter, but the same cannot be said for the streusel situation.

I'm sad to inform you that there wasn't a single morsel of streusel to be found anywhere on my Hostess coffee cake. I don't know if there was a glitch at the factory the day my specific package was filled, or if the coffee cake absorbed its own topping. Is that a thing? Either way, it's a huge miss for the individually packaged coffee cakes. A coffee cake without the famous crumb finish is like a Lil Jon song without the "yeahs". It just doesn't hit the same. On top of the curious case of the missing streusel, the whole experience is marred by a weird aftertaste that combines cinnamon and regret. Although the cake itself has a nice, soft texture, the Hostess Coffee Cakes are a let down.

The minute I saw the package of hot pink Hostess Zingers, I knew they were not for me. Just looking at the picture made my teeth hurt because I got the feeling the Zingers are hella sweet. However, I have a job to do, so I went in with the most open mind possible. Almost like almost every other Hostess snack in existence, the cake part of the Zinger is soft and the cream filling is standard for the snack cake giant. The ratio between the two is balanced well, all things considered. The flavor on the outside is supposed to be raspberry and coconut. I am a coconut fanatic so I did enjoy those notes, if not anything else about the Zinger.

The pink hue under the coconut flakes is much prettier than it tastes. I didn't get the raspberry essence specifically. All I could really taste was an overpowering, sweet, nondescript, contrived fruit flavor. It's a shame because I can be a total sucker for a solid raspberry dessert. Give me the viral raspberry chocolate bark, or the new raspberry filled cookies from Costco. That's the kind of raspberry positivity I need in my life, not the Zinger. The Hostess Zinger does look identical to its picture on the box, so at least there's no false advertising going on. I suppose if you enjoy desserts with the kind of fruit flavor that tastes lab grown instead of coming directly from nature, this might be a good choice for you to add to your shopping list.

Twinkies are hands down one of the most Hostess famous delicacies. There are many people on this earth who revere the Twinkie as a legendary treat, and they'll stand by that. I'm not one of them. I mean, they are not terrible. However, I don't get the hype or the love for them at all. I'll give it to Hostess that it knows how to make a decent sponge cake, by packaged snack cake standards of course. That part of the Twinkie hasn't changed since I had my first one as a child circa the '80s. The golden Twinkie is literally like that friend you have from high school who has not aged since Algebra 1.

Both the golden sponge cake and the creamy filling are very sweet. The two together kind of meld into the same sugary flavor. It's like one monotonous note with nothing distinctive to offer. Honestly, the only Twinkie I have ever experienced that I genuinely enjoyed is a deep fried Twinkie, straight from the oil, served by a carnival worker. That's the kind of Twinkie I can say is enjoyable. Pair it with a deep fried Oreo and you are winning the gluttonous dessert game. I was today year's old when I learned that some people throw Twinkies on the grill to elevate the treat. Also, am I the last person to know that people are out there air frying Twinkies?

The Hostess Powdered Donettes are a fan favorite among my kids. A Donette will never be able to top a fresh donut, but it will do in a pinch. Let's just get that out of the way. The mini donut from Hostess is a very basic treat. The soft little cakey bite comes with no bells or whistles. It only has the generous dusting of powdered sugar that always leaves a trail behind on whatever fingers touched it. I mean, all you'd have to do to see what your kid is really up to is hand them a couple Hostess Powdered Donettes. Before you know it a trail of their destruction will be stamped with powdery little pieces of evidence.

Here's the deal with the Hostess Powdered Donettes. Yes, it's a classic and the texture and taste are fine. They are pretty much standard issue packaged powdered donuts, and what you see is what you get every single time. That's not an insult either because there is definitely a time and place for such a snack. You won't be underwhelmed, or even overwhelmed. You'll just be whelmed. That's the best you'll get with Hostess Powdered Donettes.

At first glance, the portion size of the Suzy Q from Hostess can't be ignored. We have to talk about it. Every other Hostess snack is either small or at the very least respectably sized. Suzy Q, however, is called a mega-sized snack cake on the packet, and that is not a lie in the slightest. Her two ample slices of rich chocolate cake are flanking a layer of sweet and creamy filling. The closest thing I can compare Suzy Q to would be a distant cousin of the beloved whoopee pie. Same idea, slightly different flavors.

Let me be clear that a good whoopee pie is my jam, and I take them very seriously. Suzy Q is not nearly as delicious, or as large as a real whoopee, but it's a decent second choice if that's the dessert vibe you are going for. The cake part is soft and decadent, and the cream is the exact Hostess signature cream that graces most of its dessert treats. If you are a fan of Hostess concoctions in general, but always wish there were more to enjoy after you take your last bite, Suzy Q is your gal.

Not to play favorites, but Snoballs might just be the cutest Hostess snack cakes of the entire bunch. The outside is a perfectly pink display of shredded coconut bits, and let's just pause there for a moment. If you are not into coconut on any level, stay far away from the Hostess Snoballs because that's by far its biggest flex and its cake claim to fame. This cute little treat is for coconut lovers and coconut lovers only. 

It's when you cut the Hostess Snoball open to reveal the inside layers that this treat really wins you over. Let's go layer by layer, because she deserves it. Under the yummy pink coconut finish lies a gooey layer of marshmallow cream. Underneath that delicious little treasure is a layer of the go-to Hostess chocolate cake. Then, smack in the middle as in many of the brand's confections, a taste of the trademark sweet cream. It's a trifecta of tastiness and hits so many different cravings at once with the multi-layered presentation. The Snoball is also surprisingly light and fluffy for having so many components. I dare you to simply look at a Hostess Snoball and not smile. It has that effect.

The Hostess Churro Donettes are a completely different beast from the traditional powdered option by the brand. While the mini donut is the same size and shape as the powdered one, the flavor is significantly more memorable in every way. It's the same moist cakey donut, but the churro version is covered in a cinnamon sugar exterior and it's glorious. The best part of the whole churro Donette experience, however, is hands down the little crunchy bits that finish it off. In related news, guys I think I found the missing crumbly magic that was supposed to be on top of the blah Hostess Coffee Cakes.

These are quite literally the perfect sweet treat if you love all the cinnamon things. Don't underestimate the serious flavor because of the small stature. The cinnamon is unapologetically bold and the texture is excellent. Smooth and moist meet sweet and crumbly, and the whole thing just works. The sugary crunch of the outside coating will hook you immediately and you'll want these around a lot more when a sugar craving strikes. Plus, they are so tiny that you'll play that game where you pretend like it takes quite a few to match the portion of a regular sized donut. What do you think it is, four? Because I feel like it's four. These delicious minis absolutely earned their spot near the favorable end of the rankings.

The way I love a Hostess Ding Dong is embedded deep in my soul. It's not just because they always remind me of sitting on the stoop of my grandmother's Long Island home with my cousins while we took down a whole box together. As a long-time chocolate lover, they are totally my cup of tea. The unassuming round dessert offers tasty chocolate cake with the usual dollop of light but creamy filling. Hostess then takes the whole thing and enrobes it in rich chocolate, too.

Pour me a glass of milk, hand over a Hostess Ding Dong, and you will earn a place in my heart. I don't even need a plate. Just put it right in my hands. The Ding Dong is such a simple snack cake, but it's a real taste bud pleaser. Although there is no doubt about the repetition of many of the Hostess flavors and characteristics present in the treats, they really do have slightly different flavors and energy. The Ding Dong is a definite shoo-in for second place in this Hostess ranking, and I'll never turn one down.

She is beauty, she is grace. She is the most iconic Hostess treat. The chocolate cupcakes from Hostess are the GOAT. Period. The frosted chocolate cake surrounds the center of creamy filling. From there it only gets better. There is a thin blanket of chocolate icing that hangs over the top of the cupcake. If you didn't peel the whole sheet of chocolatey icing off in one piece at least once as a kid, you have not fully lived. The Hostess cupcake is finished with the Hostess coded white squiggly line scribbled right across the top. A Hostess Chocolate Cupcake is pure perfection and will never go out of style.

While the Hostess Chocolate Cupcake stands strong all on its own, you will never understand its full potential until you go out of the box. I'm talking specifically about experiencing the cupcake as the star of its very own indulgent milkshake, and I am speaking from very personal experience, so hear me out. There used to be a burger joint we frequented, and this shake is still one of the best things I have ever tasted in my entire life. They basically take a couple of Hostess chocolate cupcakes, toss them into milk and ice cream, and blend the whole cupcakes into the shake. You get outrageous chunks of them with every sip. Then, they put an entire Hostess cupcake on the very top, stick a straw through it, and hand you the milkshake that dreams are made of.

I purchased 10 varieties of Hostess snacks available at my local Walmart. I tasted each one before ultimately deciding on how to rank them from worst to best. Factors that affect the spot on the list include, flavor, texture, toppings, fillings, and appearance. While I am already familiar with most of the Hostess snacks, I was able to conduct this ranking with an open mind because I take my job seriously.