The One Place Bartenders Hate Customers Sitting In

A few tips to consider before visiting your local bar or tavern: They will roll their eyes if you state that you can taste the alcohol in your drink (which is a bit like complaining that you can taste the meat in your burger, but there you go). You will get great service at any bar if you generally act like the adult you claim to be. And if you sit at one particular area in a bar, you will rocket to the top of that bartender's personal dislike list.

This no-go zone is the well, an area beneath the bar top (the serving surface at a bar) where drink ingredients — usually of the cheaper variety —  are readily available to bartenders. It goes by other names, such as speed rack or speed rail, and it's the source for the term "well drinks," which are beverages mixed with lower-shelf alcohol (as opposed to a "call drink," which is one made with the customer's choice of a liquor brand). The well is also where bartenders would prefer that you do not park yourself for extended periods — or at all, really.

Many bartenders have taken to social media to voice their annoyance with patrons who sit at the well. "Even with a completely empty bar, someone or a couple will scoot the chairs together and sit where I make and serve drinks from," wrote one weary Redditor on r/bartenders. "I try to split chairs (or take a chair or two away) so there is a natural gap — but folks see it as a place to move a chair to." Another expressed astonishment at these customers' obliviousness: "You see the black rubber mats, the lack of space it creates for you to set down a plate or a glass, and the fact that no chair was at that space before you dragged one over here." And yet, and yet.  

Perhaps you like to watch a bartender mix drinks. Perhaps the proximity makes you feel less socially anxious. Or maybe you just meet this bartender's explanation on Reddit: "They're either oblivious or reeeeeally f–king lonely." Regardless of the reason, bartenders prefer that you do not sit at the well, and are quite prepared to discourage you if you choose to do so. 

Some of these methods take an aggressive tack. "I would normally respond to this by squeezing the juiciest lime in my fruit tray towards them," wrote one Redditor.  "Nine out of 10 times, they would get the hint. The ones that didn't and would complain, I would ask if they'd ever been to Sea World. 'Would you sit in Shamu's splash zone and expect to not get wet?'" Others employ a firm hand: "I used to refuse service," noted another. "Six months ago I installed a rail to make it impossible." Still others dislike it, but also see it as part of the cost of transacting with paying customers. "Bro, they expect to be able to talk to you — most people do, especially when the bar is empty," added one patient off-duty bartender. "Drives me crazy sometimes too, but I'm learning to accept it."

All this to say: Consider the bartender if you decide to perch at the well. That's where they work, and probably don't enjoy someone hovering there any more than you would appreciate a stranger parking a chair next to you at your place of employment. There's also a good chance that you're going to be moisturized with cheap alcohol. That well seat is suddenly less appealing, isn't it?