Avoid This One Canned Meat - It's A Disaster In More Ways Than One

Canned meat isn't quite as popular as it once was. Now that we can preserve fresh meat pretty effectively, we don't necessarily need the preservative-packed likes of Spam or Vienna sausages anymore. But that doesn't mean they aren't delicious every now and then, whether eaten on their own or on a sandwich. Just try to avoid one particular canned meat: Deviled ham, which (in our opinion, anyway) simply isn't worth it.

What is deviled ham? It's a potted meat like Spam, but while Spam is formed into a solid pork-adjacent rectangle, deviled ham is a sort of rosy pink meat spread, like pâté. It's called "deviled" because, like deviled eggs, it's flavored with an array of spices, such as cayenne pepper and dijon mustard, whose heat supposedly evokes the flames of Hell. (Did we mention this term caught on in 18th-century England? That probably explains a few things.) 

While deviled ham still lines the shelves of American supermarkets, it's incredibly popular in Venezuela, where it has long been a go-to spread for crackers and flatbread (or arepas). We certainly don't mean to offend anybody's favorite snack when we say deviled ham is a potted meat to avoid, but it's just hard to get past that texture: Exactly the wrong kind of creamy, it feels like if the gelatinized bits you get when you open a can of Spam were somehow the whole meal.

Again, if you've acquired a taste for deviled ham, we aren't going to make you stop. (I mean, we're just a food website — what are we gonna do, sue you?) Goodness knows it's no better or worse for you than Spam, and that's already been pretty thoroughly reclaimed with festivals and the like in its honor. But while you won't be able to make your own Spam at home, you can make your own meat spreads — and you'll have more control over the final product, allowing you to include or exclude whatever ingredients you like. (Underwood, the most popular deviled ham brand, doesn't list most of the spices it uses; aside from mustard flour and turmeric, everything else is relegated to the ominously vague "spices" on its ingredients list.)

All you really need for your own deviled ham is ham cut into little cubes, some mayonnaise, a couple of aromatics, and whatever assortment of spices you might want to use. Combine them in a bowl, puree it with a blender, and there you go! It's perfect on crackers, perhaps next to pimento cheese spread on a delightfully low-rent charcuterie board.