Do Lobsters Scream When You Boil Them?

It's time to make like David Foster Wallace and consider the lobster. They were once so common in the waters of New England that local legends say they were served to prisoners (though this does seem a bit far-fetched). Now, lobsters are one of the most well-loved luxury foods in the United States. Although they have the hard exoskeleton of a crustacean, they contain tender, succulent meat, which is prized enough to fetch eye-watering prices. 

But at the same time, lobster can create a somewhat harrowing eating experience. With those spindly legs, it can feel like eating a spider, to say nothing of that green gunk you'll find inside each lobster. And on top of everything else, they scream when you boil them! Well, no, not really; although some people swear they can hear lobsters shriek in agony as they're boiled alive, that's actually the sound of steam escaping their shell.

Although you don't have to cook lobsters alive, keeping them alive as long as possible does yield the freshest, most tender meat. If you'd really rather not think about it, you can buy them frozen, although they may not taste as fresh. It's true that lobsters don't scream when you boil them — you would need lungs in order to scream, and lobsters don't have those. But the question of whether lobsters can feel pain — and more to the point, whether they can suffer — is still being studied, with a growing body of research suggesting that they do. (Buying lobster from a grocery store, on the other hand, may cause you pain.)

The thing about lobsters is that you can't just go up to them and ask how they're feeling, which makes finding out whether they feel pain rather difficult. We know that lobsters and other crustaceans react to painful stimuli, indicating that they're capable of feeling something they'd rather avoid. Some scientists say that this is enough to prove that they feel pain, but others aren't so sure. 

After all, lobsters don't have a complex nervous system. In fact, they are quite literally brainless, though they do have nociceptors — a neuron responsible for coding pain in many animals, including humans. If you were to be dipped in boiling water, it's safe to say you would feel some strong negative emotions, but you have a brain and a very sophisticated nervous system. Do lobsters feel something similar despite not having our same faculties? Even if we don't know for sure, there are signs that lobsters do, in fact, have a response to pain that's deeper than a simple reflex. 

So how do you avoid causing unnecessary pain for your lobster? Well, if you happen to have a lot of marijuana lying around, you can do what Maine restauranteur Charlotte Gill tried and hotbox your lobsters, which she claimed significantly reduced their stress. You can also try keeping lobsters in ice water for 20 minutes, which will sedate them. From there, quickly cutting the animal down the underside (from head to tail) with a sharp knife is the fastest, most humane way to kill it. Some will tell you that the ice water bath will work for keeping it stunned when boiling alive, but that actually prolongs the process.