Why Grooms Get Their Own Cakes At Southern Weddings

Having grown up in Southern California, I was largely unfamiliar with the concept of a groom's cake until I saw the classic tear-jerker, "Steel Magnolias." In one scene, two characters, played by Sally Field and Julia Roberts, chuckle about a disturbing armadillo-shaped groom's cake that the latter's fiancé has commissioned for their wedding that afternoon. A groom's cake at a wedding is largely a Southern tradition. It doesn't replace a wedding cake in all its stately glory, but is an extra treat that primarily represents the groom's preferred flavors, colors, and interests.

It's no secret that a wedding day is, overwhelmingly, the vision of the bride. Generally, she chooses the theme, colors, flowers, clothing, and, yes, the wedding cake. Including a groom's cake allows the groom to share a bit about the things he loves. Traditionally, in the South, a groom's cake features more robust flavors than wedding cakes. So, instead of a white cake-white icing combination that a wedding cake traditionally follows, many groom's cakes get flavored with things like chocolate or booze. But while this extra confection is aligned with the Southern states (where boiled peanuts are a staple, too), the tradition wasn't born there. Rather, it stemmed from what couples were doing for their weddings in Victorian England, the era in which royal icing is believed to have been created.

In England, during the late 19th century, some posh weddings had three cakes. One was specifically for guests, while the other two were for bridesmaids and groomsmen. As Brits immigrated to America and into the Southern states, they naturally brought this tradition with them. Eventually, Southerners opted for two cakes: a large, detailed wedding cake for guests, and a groom's cake, also for guests but on a smaller scale. For a time, the belief was that if a single woman placed a slice of the groom's cake under her pillow that night, she would dream about her future groom.

Today, everyone is free to partake in a slice of groom's cake, which is good news for me, because if I have the choice between a piece of bourbon-soaked chocolate cake and a vanilla cake with custard filling, I'm going for the former every time — even if it's shaped like the Millennium Falcon. Sometimes, a groom's cake isn't served at the wedding reception at all, but instead, at the rehearsal dinner the evening before. One of the best things about a groom's cake is that it transcends all kinds of themes, religions, and traditions. Since it's not necessarily supposed to match the rest of the wedding, it becomes a fun and delicious addition to any type of celebration you can dream up — even one with a Costco wedding cake.