The Restaurant Seating Mistake That Can Quickly Ruin Your Meal

We're guessing you don't go out to eat every day. Unless you're one of the undercover reporters Michelin sends to restaurants in order to formulate the yearly guide, you probably only go out to eat a couple times per month. And with the economy being what it is, you may only go out to a really nice restaurant once or twice a year for your birthday or anniversary — if that. With that in mind, you probably want to make sure your experience goes as smoothly as possible — which is why you'll want to avoid sitting in an especially high-traffic area.

Why is that? It's simple. If you're going out to eat with someone, you're probably interested in conversing with them, which is markedly more difficult when a waiter is breezing past your seat to prepare one of those absurd tableside dish presentations every 10 seconds. Of course it's not the waiter's fault — they have a job to do, after all, and they're certainly not obligated to take the scenic route just so you can chit-chat — but the commotion could make your dinner a little more frustrating, and for the money you're probably spending (even at a modestly-priced restaurant), any amount of frustration is too much. That's why, if you can help it, you should avoid sitting near places like the kitchen door, or the entrance to the patio.

So now you know why you'd rather not be seated at a table near the bathrooms, but the question remains: where, exactly, should you hope to sit? Admittedly, this may be a matter over which you have little control. If it's a busy night, you will be sat wherever there's space, and asking to be moved to a different table will cause the waitstaff a major headache; but if you can help it, you might want to sit at a "display table." That means it's near the front of the restaurant, affording you a view of the whole dining room, but not so close to the door that you'll get a gust of outside air every time it opens. If you really want that particular table, and would rather not leave it in the hands of fate, make a reservation ahead of time.

Then again, you may find that it's not worth the trouble. We don't live in an Edith Wharton novel — nobody's enforcing a rigid social hierarchy through table placements, and sitting next to the kitchen is hardly an ignominious fate. Dining has been democratized in recent years, to the extent where you can enjoy a pretty decent experience no matter where you sit in a restaurant. But if you have a strong personal preference, it wouldn't hurt to pick up that phone and make a booking. Just don't stack your plates for the waiters when you're done.