You Might Want To Avoid Soft Serve On A Cruise Ship. Here's Why.

Buffets tend to simultaneously be the best and the worst thing about cruises: They're great because they're often included in the ticket, and let you eat a lot of food (like, a lot). They're also terrible, because, at best, the food is edible. The one thing you can count on is the soft serve ice cream, a classic goodie that is almost impossible to mess up. Kids love it, adults love it, and the crew loves it because self-serve reduces the need to wait on wailing children demanding a sugar rush as if it were their birthright. It might be the best thing in the buffet — and you should probably avoid it.

We hate to be the bearers of bad news, we really do. In a perfect world, we would tell our readers to eat enough soft serve to make their bellies hurt, but we need them alive (or at least healthy enough) to read our stories, which is jeopardized if they're throwing up after contracting listeria. But sadly, soft serve ice cream has been linked to listeria outbreaks in the U.S., and experts believe it's one of the foods to skip while on a cruise. Although soft serve machines need to be properly cleaned every day to prevent bacteria and mold build up, this protocol isn't always observed. Gross passengers also ignore basic hygiene and touch everything (including cups and cones) without washing their hands, which makes it easier for the spread of listeria, norovirus, and other food-borne illnesses. 

So are you actually supposed to partake in the most indulgent form of travel without eating quantities of ice cream that would shock even your seven-year-old self? Of course not. We would never tell someone to cruise without ice cream — we're not monsters. That said, there are some precautions that you might want to take, like finding out how often the machines are cleaned out. You can look on online forums or ask the staff — if they're hesitant to answer or "aren't sure," take that to mean "not often enough." 

You can also see if there are any ice cream places on board that are not self-serve, which are safer because staff is held to higher hygiene standards than sugar-crazed children or adults who never learned the basics of cleanliness. These might not be included in your ticket, but shelling out a couple of bucks is probably worth it to avoid getting sick while on vacation.

Of course, there are those who like to live fast and risk it all. If you want to play a game of listeria Russian roulette, go ahead and get that cone that might've been touched by a six-year-old who just picked their nose. It could give you a chance to enjoy a tasty treat that's basically free, or leave you hugging the toilet. Also, join complementary ice cream parties when they're offered, because they're probably not spawned from the need to make room in ship freezers for any individuals who pass away during the cruise.