Is It Rude To Order Another Round From A Food Runner At A Restaurant?

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You might think that a restaurant server's main job is to deliver food and drinks to your table, and in most cases, you'd be correct. In more upscale restaurants, however, a server might be more of a salesman, trying to talk you into ordering a more expensive bottle of wine. In such cases, some or all of your food may be delivered by a runner. (Or a robot cat, in the case of one Arizona ramen restaurant.) If a runner is bringing you your order, is it okay to ask them for another round of drinks? According to etiquette expert Lisa Mirza Grotts, author of "A Traveler's Passport to Etiquette in a Post-Pandemic World," the answer is no. 

"The food runner's job is to bring food from the kitchen to the table, not to take drink orders," Grotts told The Takeeout. "It's a bit like asking the mail carrier to pick up your dry cleaning — wrong task, wrong role." But even if it's not technically 'correct,' that doesn't mean it's completely out of the question. "If you do flag them down, keep it simple: A polite request to notify your server is acceptable."

Even though you shouldn't place an order directly with a food runner, Grotts did say there are some drink-related questions you can ask them. (And food-related ones, too, since the word 'food' is literally in their job title.) As mentioned above, she told us it's okay to request that the food runner send the server your way, or even notify them that your table is ready to order more drinks. This should come as welcome news to the server, after all, since more drinks likely equals a bigger tip.

There are several other questions that Grotts permits you to ask, since these questions don't need to be directed to your server. They include inquiring about a drink that's taking a long time to arrive or asking for a water glass to be refilled. You may even be able to ask about a drink you see listed on the menu (or one you don't see), since food runners are usually trained to be familiar with the restaurant's offerings. Grotts did issue a caveat, however: "Avoid treating them like your personal bartender because they have their hands full enough getting hot plates to the table before they turn cold." (This is especially true if you're at a restaurant that serves sizzling fajitas.)

Okay, so what are you supposed to do if your server's deep in the weeds and you haven't seen them for a while? Or, if you have, they are running around like the proverbial beheaded chicken? "If your server's swamped and you're parched, there's a polite workaround," Grotts said. "Flag down a manager or host and discreetly ask for help." If you don't see either of them floating around, you could get up and look or have someone point you in the right direction.

Yet another thing you could do if there's a walk-up bar (as opposed to a service bar, which may be hidden in the kitchen) is to go and order your drinks directly from the bartender. If these drinks are meant to replace an order you already placed at the table, Grotts advised, "Be sure to let your server know so they don't duplicate the order or miss the gratuity." If you do wind up with double drinks, that's on you, so you might as well down them and take an Uber home.