What's The Worst Snack To Eat In A Meeting?

Snacks make everything better—but some nibbles are more meeting-friendly than others.

I've got a lot of issues with the concept of professionalism. I've seen it wielded to preserve outdated (read: sexist, racist) ideas of who gets to be taken seriously. On a lighter note, it once led a stuffy executive to question my deranged Twitter presence, which I find physically and spiritually problematic, sir. Fortunately, office overlords are slowly starting to recognize their drones as human—which means feeding us in meetings. Snacks are never a bad thing—but are there certain meeting snacks you'd prefer to avoid?

First, I have to admit that this topic was inspired by, ugh, former United States Attorney General William Barr. In his upcoming book (whatever), Barr claims that former president Donald Trump passed out "his stash of big Hershey chocolate bars as if dealing cards" during Oval Office meetings. I think this was meant to be a burn on Trump—some kind of commentary about his nutritional practices as if his cholesterol was the most evil thing about him. But passing out chocolate during meetings might be... the only good thing the dude has ever done.

What snacks are ideal for meetings?

That got me thinking about the best meeting foods. For me, that includes candy of all kinds, unlimited coffee, open bowls of chips (no crinkly bags), and doughnuts (no jelly filling, please). Anything that's easy to eat with your hands and leaves you free to take notes and/or play M.A.S.H. with your neighbor.


But not all snacks are meeting-friendly. While I'm against outdated perceptions of professionalism, I like my job and respect my colleagues. Thus, I'd rather avoid any foods that involve taking huge, messy bites (bagels) or flinging sauce (pasta). I'm also self-conscious about being a loud eater, so I'd like to steer clear of individually packaged foods that require me to root around in a noisy wrapper.

What about you, readers? As we make our collective return to in-person meetings, I'd like to hear about your ideal—and less-than-ideal—meeting snacks.