Texas Walmart Subject To Bat-Shit Invasion Involving Literal Bat Shit

By  Gwen Ihnat

Shoppers in Alvin, Texas probably thought they were just headed out on a regular errand on Monday night. Stopping by the Walmart to pick up some groceries, possibly something in the meat department. Fortunately, some of those shoppers were super-quick on their phones, so when a swarm (flock?) of bats swooped into said meat department, they filmed the whole thing:

ABC affiliate KTRK talked to one of those shoppers, Jerry Lattermann: "While he couldn't tell us where he thought the bats came from, Lattermann said most of the bystanders seemed to have a good time watching them as they scoped out the store aisles." Oh, we would react the same way, if "having a good time" equals "diving under shopping carts for shelter while screaming and sobbing."

KTRK continues, "At one point, the bats could be seen flying around the bakery, but seemed to prefer the cooler temperatures around the steaks and cold cuts." Of course they headed toward the meat, because they were deadly carnivorous vampire bats! Unless they were fruit bats? Are those herbivores? Either way, we don't trust them indoors. Outside, we're happy when they eat mosquitoes and things though.

This incident quickly brought out the big guns: An inspection by an Alvin health official, who "observed evidence of bat guano [which means exactly what you think it means] in the lawn and garden area." While Walmart is working with contractors to fix the roof and seal off any other possible points of entry into the store, the city of Alvin states that if any further bat sightings are observed, "the store will be required to close until the situation is rectified."

Still, some shoppers were nonplussed:

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