Taco Bell Switches Up Value Menu, Confusing A Nation Of Stoners

When it comes to fast food, plenty of us are creatures of habit. (That goes doubly so for those ordering while uh, under the influence.) We have our safe, default order: you know what you want, where it is on the menu, which add-ons to select, how much it's going to cost. No guesswork. No surprises. Except that Taco Bell is set to overhaul its value menu, throwing off stoned and drunk customers nationwide.

Here's what to expect come December 27 when the changes take effect, per a Taco Bell press release:

  • There won't be a separate $1 Cravings menu distinct from the $5 Cravings deals; all "deals" will be rolled into a $1-$5 "Cravings Value Menu."
  • The Craving Value Menu will add two new $1 options: a Chicken Enchilada Grande Burrito and a Three Cheese Nacho Grande Burrito.
  • Taco Bell will launch an ad campaign about the new value menu on digital channels and TV, featuring "fantastical and surreal" imagery. (Frankly, surreal burritos sound vaguely scary to us.)
  • The Cravings Value Menu will feature a $1 Taco & Burritos category, a $1 Specialty category—Triple Layer Nachos, Cheesy Roll-Up, Spicy Tostada, Shredded Chicken Mini Quesadilla, etc.—and a $5 box category.
  • Our plan is to study the changes above before December 27 to avoid panicking at the register. If you make flashcards, please share them with your fellow Taco Bell enthusiasts.

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