World Cries Out In Agony As Spanish Wine Tank Ruptures, Ruining 66,000 Bottles' Worth Of Wine

The video you're about to see is not easy to watch. If you're standing up, sit down. Actually, you should probably lie down, because this clip is so disturbing, it may induce fainting, dizziness, or comas. I know this might be a lot to process on a Monday, but I don't make the news, folks, I just report it. Sorry.

That, dear reader, is a tsunami of more than 13,000 gallons of red wine gushing from a ruptured tank at a Spanish winery. That's roughly 66,666 bottles of wine that shall never see the light of day. Oh, the humanity!

The accident occurred at Bodegas Vitivinos in Villamalea in Albacete in central Spain, which produces up to 6 million kilograms of wine grapes a year. For those of you who don't feel like whipping out your calculator, that's roughly 13,227,700 pounds, or 1,102 African elephants (because we Americans will measure with anything but the metric system). According to local sources, the spill was precipitated by a faulty fermentation tank. Thankfully, no injuries were reported, aside from the countless people whose tempranillo-hued hearts were left bleeding after watching this now viral video.

Normally I'd suggest pouring one as tribute to the fallen, but this event is a harrowing reminder that every drop of wine is precious. Instead, let's all pause for a moment of silence to reflect on what could have been, and express our gratitude for all the wine that remains unspilled. I wish it didn't take a ruptured tank to make us realize how good we've had it, but nonetheless, we ought to count our blessings every day and appreciate the all the wines that have brought us so much joy. Rest in peace, lost wine. We'll see you on the other side.