Seafood Restaurant Politely Acknowledges Chicago Bull Zach LaVine's Severe Defense Allergy
NBA player Zach LaVine has a seafood allergy and a sick burn for which he'll be needing some ointment, metaphorically speaking, after being dunked on, metaphorically speaking, by a seafood restaurant's social media team.
It all started when a well-meaning Chicagoan came across an ongoing Twitter dustup betwixt the Maryland-based Jimmy's Famous Seafood and PETA. (It's a whole thing.) Jimmy's responded with an outlandish request.
If MJ comes out of retirement to play for y'all again, we'll come along as part of the package, too.
— Jimmy's Famous Seafood (@JimmysSeafood) August 26, 2018
The user responded, rightly, that Michael Jordan might not be a great asset as a player these days (though, in the humble opinion of The Takeout's staff, he has great taste in tequila). He also suggested that maybe current player Zach LaVine, who's got a hell of an outside shot but has also had some injury problems, was a worthy replacement. Jimmy's Famous Seafood found that proposal somewhat lacking.
How about you give us the 78 mil you wasted on LaVine, and we give you free crab cakes for life?
— Jimmy's Famous Seafood (@JimmysSeafood) August 26, 2018
And this, dear Reader, is when the young guard got involved.
A nice little comeback! But LaVine was not prepared for how thoughtfully the restaurant was considering his other allergies:
And defense
— Jimmy's Famous Seafood (@JimmysSeafood) August 26, 2018
To his credit, LaVine took it in stride, probably because he's making a shit ton of money and can't eat shellfish anyway, so what the hell does he care?
😂😂
— Zach LaVine (@ZachLaVine) August 26, 2018
Thus endeth the food-related social media spat of the week (h/t Yahoo Sports). I shall say no more, except to share my new favorite basketball-adjacent Twitter thing, from my beloved C.J. McCollum of the Portland Trail Blazers.
Im trying Jennifer
— CJ McCollum (@CJMcCollum) August 15, 2018