Seafood Restaurant Politely Acknowledges Chicago Bull Zach LaVine's Severe Defense Allergy

NBA player Zach LaVine has a seafood allergy and a sick burn for which he'll be needing some ointment, metaphorically speaking, after being dunked on, metaphorically speaking, by a seafood restaurant's social media team.

It all started when a well-meaning Chicagoan came across an ongoing Twitter dustup betwixt the Maryland-based Jimmy's Famous Seafood and PETA. (It's a whole thing.) Jimmy's responded with an outlandish request.

The user responded, rightly, that Michael Jordan might not be a great asset as a player these days (though, in the humble opinion of The Takeout's staff, he has great taste in tequila). He also suggested that maybe current player Zach LaVine, who's got a hell of an outside shot but has also had some injury problems, was a worthy replacement. Jimmy's Famous Seafood found that proposal somewhat lacking.

And this, dear Reader, is when the young guard got involved.

A nice little comeback! But LaVine was not prepared for how thoughtfully the restaurant was considering his other allergies:

To his credit, LaVine took it in stride, probably because he's making a shit ton of money and can't eat shellfish anyway, so what the hell does he care?

Thus endeth the food-related social media spat of the week (h/t Yahoo Sports). I shall say no more, except to share my new favorite basketball-adjacent Twitter thing, from my beloved C.J. McCollum of the Portland Trail Blazers.

I bought the shirt.