Sam Adams Vows To Turn Summer Weddings Into Sponsored Content

“Say it with Sam” will award $10,000 in bar tab costs to the couple with the best Sam Adams–themed vows.

For most of recorded history, weddings were about going to church... and that's about it. Maybe if the couple had some sort of social clout there'd be some sort of shindig before they got straight to baby makin', but for the majority of people, all they got was a reminder that God was looking down upon their heathen souls, awaiting the slightest reason to cast man and wife down to the fiery depths of hell, where they'd stay together for all eternity.

Thankfully, modern weddings are less about repenting and more about gluttony, lust, pride, greed, and, if certain relatives hit the open bar hard enough, wrath. (Highly entertaining wrath.) Given that weddings have already become a rather bloated spectacle in the modern era, why not sell out completely and work a well-placed advertisement into your wedding vows for the chance to win cold, hard cash?

From now until July 14, couples who work the words "Sam Adams Summer Ale" into their sacred wedding vows and have the moment captured on video can enter for a chance to win $10,000 from the Boston-based beer brand—enough, theoretically, to cover the reception's bar tab. That's right, folks, I said "a chance to win," because there's no actual guarantee that you will be rewarded for baring your soul with a side of #SponCon.

If a couple wants a real fighting chance of starting off married life with an extra ten grand in their pockets, they've got to make sure their vows are both romantic and competitive. Everyone in attendance already knows that these two are in love, but how many of those attendees know about the cool, crisp, refreshing taste of Sam Adams Summer Ale? Considering they have a captive audience, couples may want to stop focusing their vows on themselves and start using their platform to educate friends and family on important issues, like how Sam Adams Summer Ale accentuates the flavor of Hallertau Mittelfreueh Nobel Hops with hints of citrus peels and grains of paradise spice.

Do you have any ideas for penning wedding vows that celebrate true love and beer in equal measure? Share your thoughts in the comments so that they may inspire countless lovebirds who don't have the poetry in their souls to praise Sam Adams before God in the way that beer deserves.