Last Call: Can We Let Paris Hilton's Cooking Show Into Our Hearts?

It turns out that celebrities continue to exist and live their lives even long after we've stopped checking in on what that might entail. For Paris Hilton in 2020, life has involved releasing a context-free one-off cooking show on her YouTube channel simply titled "Cooking with Paris." And she's going to show us how to make her famous lasagna!

Over the course of 16 minutes, Hilton, with her perfected air of flirtatious indifference, walks us through the process of making her favorite meal. "As you all know—well, not all of you know. People who do know, know that I am an amazing cook," she begins. A strong start! I am both convinced and on board.

Other things that happen in "Cooking with Paris":

  • In attempting to recall fond childhood memories of watching her mother work in the kitchen, Paris appears to lose steam halfway through the phrase "pastas and lasagnas and Thanksgiving"
  • Diamond Baby the chihuahua gets readjusted between her owner's hands no fewer than 1,200 times
  • Elaborate tracking shot of five different sassy dish towels laid out on the counter like little soldiers
  • Mid-recipe social media updates
  • Fingerless gloves worn to prepare lasagna from start to finish, including the cheese grating stages
  • Presumably so much more
  • Notably, at the end of the video, Paris promises viewers she'll be cooking more on her YouTube channel soon: "Let me know what I should cook next, and hashtag it #CookingWithParis." And while we absolutely want you all to participate in that hashtag, we want to read your ideas here first.

    What should Paris and sous chef Diamond Baby cook next?