Nigella Lawson Butters Toast, Angers British Masses

Another day, another bout of collective hysteria over literally nothing. Yesterday, British celebrity chef Nigella Lawson drew a frankly unnecessary amount of derision from Brits after demonstrating her technique for the "platonic ideal of toast" on her BBC show, Nigella's Eat, Cook, Repeat.

Since hosting her first cooking show in 1999, Lawson has skyrocketed to culinary icon status in the UK and beyond. And like any carb-loving human being, she enjoys the occasional piece of toast with a cuppa. On the show, Lawson shared her "two-stage buttering approach" for buttering a slice of "old-fashioned sandwich loaf." Lawson apparently applies one layer of unsalted butter when the hot bread pops out of the toaster, giving the toast a "fabulous crumpety bite." Then, once the bread cools, she adds another layer of butter and a bit of salt. Sounds good, yes? Sounds like a normal thing to do, yes?

Wrong. At least, according to the British public.

Lawson's approach rankled Brits everywhere, with some commenters irritated that Lawson would dare to demonstrate something as obvious as buttering toast. To make matters worse, tabloids reported on the controversy, and The Telegraph even published the thoughts of other accomplished chefs, all of whom rejected Lawson's approach. Fortunately, Lawson found support from some, including one writer who called the approach "inspirational."

I, too, fancy Lawson's approach, being of the firm belief that most supermarket bread is really just a vessel for butter. (This doesn't apply to artisanal toasts, but that's another conversation entirely.) Let's all just take a deep breath, shall we?