Last Call: What Sandwich Are You?

Are sandwiches the most important food group? They are a universal language, a way to break down barriers and share our cultures with each other. I, an Italian American from Brooklyn, find a good hero to be sacred: the perfection of a potato-and-egg from Defonte's, the superb saltiness of a Sophia Loren from Lioni's, the near pitch-black gravy that saturates a Johnny Roastbeef from John's. Of all the things I miss from my hometown, the sandwiches might be at the top of the list.

Today on the nonstop party that is Slack, Marnie, Aimee, and I were playing "tag yourself" with the beautiful tweet you see above. Aimee identifies as a lobster roll, which is somewhat surprising because she's from Chicago, and last I checked, Chicago has still not moved any closer to a coastline. Marnie identifies a jambon beurre, which makes sense as it's utterly perfect in every single way, and I will be writing a recipe for it in the days before my annual review. As for me, I should be a number six, but I refuse to be associated with any Italian sandwich that calls itself a "sub." No matter how many well-researched reports Aimee sends me, I insist that they should only be referred to as heroes, even if 97% of Americans disagree with me. Similarly I cannot in good conscience declare myself to be a bacon, egg, and cheese, as this chart states that it should be made with a fried egg, which is also wrong (bodega scramble or GTFO). I suppose, then, that I'm lox on a bagel, though I identify as such under extreme protest. Which sandwiches do you personally identify with? Which ones do you aspire to be?