Guy Fieri's Wife Doesn't Like His Hair Either

If The Takeout has any ironclad convictions, they are these: Don't yuck someone else's yum, and don't hate on Guy Fieri. Our unabashed appreciation for the Mayor of Flavortown runs deep and true, like a surging river of Donkey Sauce. So even though Fieri's hair is the butt of the joke in this People interview with his wife Lori, First Lady of Flavotown, we're here to say the actual content of the interview is entirely heartwarming.

Interviews with and about celebrities generally read canned and stale, but Lori Fieri comes off down-to-earth as she teases Guy's hair. (No, she doesn't physically tease his hair. Shudder.)

"I always say, 'When are you going to change your haircut?' But it stuck and it's him," she tells People. "I tease him every once in a while. And I do want a little change sometimes. But that's like me changing my hair to black. I mean, I'm not going to do that for him, so."

This is adorable! It's like the dorky ribbing middle-aged couples give each other after a couple brewskis at the backyard barbecue: "Oh Sharon, you never complain about my hair color." "That's because you don't have any, Don!" Hardy har har har.

The non-follicle anecdotes are equally sweet and normal. Lori explains that because Guy is on the road so much, when he's home in Santa Rosa, California, the family skips restaurant meals out and they instead "hunker down" for backyard grilling and swimming in their pool.

Explaining their marriage, Lori says "at the end of the day, I look at him and I still genuinely like him." If that's not the realest, least cheesy compliment I've read about a celebrity marriage, I don't know what is. Anyway, I could gush another thousand words about Fieri's charitable work and all that, but I guess I'll wrap up here with an earnest plea: Fieris, adopt me? Read more about my new favorite family at People.