Aldi's Green And Boozy Cheeses Might Just Make Us Tolerate St. Patrick's Day

St. Patrick's Day in the U.S. can be a miserable, miserable affair. There's puking and yelling and some truly vile T-shirts and necklaces and so on. Here in Chicago, it's an avoid-bars-at-any-cost day. So as much as I like corned beef and cabbage (and I really like corned beef and cabbage), it's the kind of day to which I do not look forward. But Aldi, bless it, might just turn me around. At least a little.


One of our favorite grocery chains is releasing a line of limited edition cheeses for what might be the world's drunkest holiday. Two are boozy. Two are green. One's just cheddar (cheddar is good all by itself, no need to muck it up). All sound delicious. The Kitchn reports that the Happy Farms cheeses, which will be available beginning February 27, will each set you back $3.99.

The cool thing about the green cheeses is that they're colored naturally. The Preferred Pesto Gouda and English Sage Derby both achieve their green hues from the ingredient prominently featured in their names. The Pesto sounds especially good—it includes basil and garlic, and gouda is good all by itself, so add that stuff and it all sounds so good it is almost enough to make you forget all about the people ralphing on the sides of buildings at 11 a.m. on a Saturday.


As for the boozy ones, there's an Irish Cheddar With Whiskey and an Irish Cheddar With Beer. The last option is an Aged Irish Cheddar, which doesn't need bells and whistles, because it's an aged Irish cheddar.

Aldi is on a bit of a roll. Remember those punny Valentine's Day cheeses?

And this? Remember this?

It's almost enough to make us forget the chocolate wine. Thanks in advance for helping us make St. Patrick's Day marginally more tolerable, Aldi. Now just start selling the whiskey here, would you?