Please Stop Calling The Cops About Fast Food

As a collective Takeout staff, we spend an outsized portion of our day reading about food on the internet and setting up Google Alerts for nacho cheese. It's that first activity, though, that brings a troubling trend to our attention: People keep calling the cops about fast food orders. These incidents are decidedly non-emergencies. Please cease and desist from this behavior.

First up: A caller who this week contacted the Slidell, Louisiana police department to report that an area Taco Bell was out of both hard and soft shell tacos. Disappointing, to be sure, but hardly a matter for law enforcement.

Next on the list: An Indianapolis man who late last month called 911 to report the theft of his footlong Subway sandwich. No arrests were made.

And finally: A 5-year-old—okay, we'll give kids a pass—called 911 because he wanted McDonald's. And he got it, courtesy of one generous cop.

But despite the relatively benign nature of these stories, we must remind readers: 911 is for emergencies. Law enforcement resources are finite. Please deal with a lack of tacos or stolen sandwiches the proper way, by whining on social media.

I do not want to have to start a new This Month In Unnecessary Food-Related 911 Calls column. Overturned Trucks is enough.